One time I met a guy at a bar and gave him my number. The next day he asked if I remembered what he looked like.
“Duh!” I said.
The guy then sends me a picture of 3 guys and asked me which one was him. I was 110% sure I knew once I saw the picture.
I confidently said “THE ONLY CUTE ONE. The one in the middle!”I picked the wrong one guys….I picked the wrong one.
A complete stranger messaged me and asked if I want to hang out in the woods with him. “No I do not want to be murdered but thanks for asking. K byeeeee.”
Rando-“Hey girl. You wanna dance?”
Me-“I don’t gotta dance. I make money moves.”
If you take me on a date and try to sit on the same side of the booth as me it’s over and I’m writing a bad review about you.
My dad walks into my office where I’m sitting with one of the kids who is about 13. (He is also eating the T.V. dinner he stole from me.) Anyway…my dad walks in and Derreck says “Um you need to get this girl a house and put her on match.com and stop letting her put ugly pictures on the internet.”